From Burnout To Momentum: Libido As Life Energy | S4 EP106

Ready to trade hesitation for momentum? Julius takes us to the edge of comfort and names the leap: escape velocity, the instant you decide to outgrow fear and become more. We reframe libido through a Jungian lens as life energy—motivation that fuels creativity, connection, and change—so you can stop waiting for inspiration and start generating it.

I share how this show began: tired of yelling at the screen, I hit record, learned in public, and then stepped into teaching relationship anarchy. Along the way came the messy parts—awkward first videos, nerves before classes, and the real drag of burnout. We get practical about spotting dissociation, building routines that stick, and using metrics to see what’s actually working. If you’ve ever lost weeks to naps and scrolling, you’ll hear a compassionate plan to recover capacity without shaming yourself.

We dive into fear as a leftover survival reflex, not a modern oracle, and practice small social “reps” that rebuild confidence through action. For the neurodivergent crew, I offer focus tactics that honor novelty while creating daily traction: keep the big list, pick one priority, and move it first. Expect friction and boredom, then meet both with discipline, not drama. Creativity counts as progress, money goals can be honest fuel, and gratitude stabilizes the ride. The thesis is simple: desire sets direction, discipline creates thrust, and community multiplies courage.

If this sparks something, subscribe, rate, and share it with a friend who needs a nudge. Tell me the one risk you’ll take this week—DMs are open—and leave a review so more campsters can find the fire.

Got a burning question about kink, BDSM, relationships, and/or navigating the wild world of alternative lifestyles? 

Send in your questions. No topic is too taboo, no curiosity too small! We’re all making mistakes, growing, and exploring together!Submit your questions anonymously at aroundthekinkykampfire@yahoo.com or slide into our DMs at Twitter-KinkyKampfire, YT-AroundtheKinkyKampfire, IG-KampfireKinksters. Let’s keep the fire going! 

Chapters

• 0:00 Late Night Setup And ASMR Pour
• 5:11 Show Format And Listener Shoutouts
• 7:51 Defining Escape Velocity And Growth
• 12:45 Starting The Podcast And Teaching RA
• 16:54 Jungian Libido As Motivation
• 21:39 Fear, Rejection, And Social Skills

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:37

Welcome to around the kick or drink. This is the podcast where we explore the wild, wonderful sometimes. Whether you're a seasoned player, curious newbie, or just here for the story, we've got something for you. Join us on Thursdays on your favorite podcast platform as we share experiences, dive into deep discussions, and maybe spark a little fire of your own. No shame, no judgment, just real talk around the kinky campfire. Let's get lit. Welcome back, everybody, to Around the Kiki Campfire. This is your host, HH Julius. As you can see, it's another video podcast, and I'm almost ready to do the thing I do before Betty. It is a late night episode, and you can just call me Julius, just Julius, instead of the whole entire thing if you're feeling less fancy. Now, to get us started, I actually will do the ASMR. Five seconds, two seconds. Right now, I can even show you what I'm drinking. This is this right here. Late night libations for Pedro Azul, not sponsored. Um 100% agave azul. It's pretty good. 40% alcohol, like most tequila, is that is what we have today. Tequila. I have me a little cup, a little fancy cup here, right here. And we're gonna start this ASMRs uh five seconds and account of three, two, one. There is a uh whiskey ice in there, cube, sure, whatever that is, and uh, we're gonna go ahead and get started. So, right now, sitting on the couch, as you can see behind me, we have the couch prepared and we have a video podcast. So people will hear this on Thursday, and then everybody else will see this if you want to see this on the YouTube channel on Friday, same time around noon Easter, both days. Okay. Thank you for people that watched it and listening and all my downloaders. I appreciate y'all as well. At a high month, for some reason, people wanted to hear kinky talk on Halloween shocker. So we're still having high downloads from there. But, anyways, y'all don't really care about that behind the scenes stuff. This is Around the Kinky Campfire. New episodes on Thursdays. We talk about polyamory, well, non-monogamy, queer kink stuff, and today's topic, which I have not explained to y'all, is escape velocity. Libido identity and the psychology of becoming more. That's basically what it's going to be about: escape velocity. What inspires you, motivates you, gets you going in order to move on to the next step? We want to evolve. Once again, we are a very much self-awareness podcast, and we try to elevate ourselves and grow. That's what we try to do here. So, what is it that changes you and gets you to move on to the next step? We're all about growth and evolution here. We'll continue to be because you know what? People fuck up, and that's what happens. And we try to grow and learn from those mistakes. That's exactly what we do here at around the kiki campfire. Always messing up, just like now. Still doing video stuff. I'm getting closer now with the video, getting comfortable. Still a little awkward to be sitting here on my couch instead of sitting in my desk doing the podcast. But for now, we're gonna keep this going. We might switch back and forth, but we're gonna, you know, do that this thing here that we're doing, henceforth for now until we don't do it anymore. So that's how it is. These are short episodes when I'm talking about myself, so it's not too long, as y'all see the time by myself like half the episode when I have a special guest, um, which I will kind of do every now and then. And then what uh you know, the one thing I still forgot was to turn the lights on, but there's lights back there as well. Still getting stuff done and fucking up along the way. We'll see how it goes now. Okay, escape velocity. There was a point where I didn't do podcasts, I was not doing a podcast, and I got tired of yelling at my screen, which y'all know hate hated just having an opinion and then just yelling into the void. It's like I was like, you know what? I need to record this and put this out on the internet. A little bit of sarcasm, sarcasm, a little bit of narcissism, but I feel like I have an opinion based on my experience and based uh backed up by factual information that I need to get out to people. Not a whole lot of POC commentary out there. Can y'all tell that I just came from like improv practice? Got a lot of rhyming going on. You know, that's you warm up and then you can rhyme a little bit. That's how it goes. Uh, and I specifically uh it was during quarantine, and it was like, all right, I gotta I gotta get this opinion out here. So I finally bought some podcast equipment. And another few months later is when I finally decided to start the podcast. For those of y'all that have been here from the beginning, appreciate it. Um, as y'all know, it was started as a group, and now it's just me, and had to keep going and trying to do new things now, as far as like teaching all the different things because I talk about relationship anarchy all the time on this podcast. Hold on one second. Um this year I have started to finally teach that class, and I'm gonna be teaching it again. So I've taught it two times now in the abbreviated version, and I'm gonna teach it now in a couple weeks for the full-on version. So we'll see how that goes. Hopefully, I won't be spitting as much as I am now. Okay, but there is a um motivation behind all these different things, and I had to go through the suck. I didn't embrace the uncomfortable part of probably sounding like I don't know what I'm talking about, and then going in and then um actually asking to do the class, and somebody said yes, and that was even scarier, but I did it, and now I have to go teach this class. Boy, uh but I I I hit the motivation that I needed, and I went in and decided to talk and decided to teach this class. I had to um get the notes together just like I did for this podcast. Every episode, gotta get the notes together and figure out what I'm talking about.

unknown: 7:41

Woo!

SPEAKER_00: 7:42

Just hit me now. I'm getting all like nervous about it, even even now, a couple weeks out. We'll see how it goes, though. Um, when I'm talking about motivation and like libido, it's not just the sexual libido. We're talking about the Carl Young version of it. So it's just motivational energy in general. What inspires you to move from your current position metaphorically, metaphysically, whatever it is, not necessarily the actual um place that you're in, just the state of being that you are here, and then going over there to make it different. Okay, that's what we're talking about. And talked to Shannon uh a few weeks ago talking about capacity for change. So that's one of the things uh didn't really get to dive deep into in that podcast episode. I'm gonna try to do it now. It is your willingness to be different. So, once again, having that libido energy and then willing to change your state. Embrace the uncomfortable, get uncomfortable, get comfortable being uncomfortable. Are we able to do that as a society? I ask you this question. Are we able to do that? Seems like a lot of people aren't able to do that, and I, for one, cannot be associated with those people. Hopefully, y'all can still hear me. And uh it's uh yeah, it's just like a turnoff. It's like even not even a romantic sense, not even like a relationship, that kind of relationship, romantic relationship, friendships, too. People just cool, just sticking around and being in that same place. Like, I can't do that. I gotta, I gotta get my um, oh, what was it? Uh lock in. This is what the kid's saying now for this part of the year until the next year starts. We're locking in. Like, okay, sure. That's my life you're talking about there. And uh, yeah, it's just uh we got we that should be an all-time thing, not just a once a year thing, but locking in. And then once you uh start changing, you might lose some people along the way, and it's like, okay, well, um, too bad, so sad, but I gotta keep moving up. And then if you don't want to come with me, you don't have to come with me, but I will be here for you if you decide to do that. Ugh. Goodness. Ugh. Okay, escape velocity. It's the the specific moment that you decide to outgrow your fear. I mean, it's scary going into the uncomfortable place. It's not uh it biologically, it's not what we decide to do because, of course, back in the day when we were all living in the little small villages, if somebody went out into the unknown, they might not come back. Might get eaten by a bear or a bobcat. And it's like we don't want to do that now, even in this point in time when we have like bear repellent and we have cars and stuff. Like you can go out and be safe, and there's even devices that you carry in your pocket that globally position your position, and people can find you without even contacting you. They just have your device matched to their device and they can find you. But yet, people are scared to go talk to somebody they've never met before, and it's like you will be safe now. You do not live in a little village, and if you get rejected by people, guess what? You will have other people that you can come in contact with. So just know that it is scary, but you don't have to succumb to that fear. That type of deal. Goodness, it's like, oh, people are scared to do something. That's I know I'm saying it like it's like really simple, but you know what, people, it it's a thing, and it is a skill we have to work on. I've said this many, many times. You gotta work on these skills. That's why they're called social skills. That is something that happens. We have social skills, and we must work on them. You must work on them. All right, so more things about libido. We'll just go ahead and skip over that. But if you want to know more about the Jung Jungian, Jungian um definition of libido, listen or definitely look up uh John uh Carl Jung, the godfather of psychological stuff, uh has had a lot of people that are Jungian theorists, they believe in a lot of his teachings and what he has said. I'm not one of the smart people that uh wrote books or anything about that, but I believe in a lot of it. And he talked about libido in a way that made sense to me because a lot of people like to relate it to sex, and it's not just about sex, it's about energy in general. Want to read more about that, then you definitely should read an intro to Carl Jung or a book about him, or even a podcast about, or like a video, YouTube video about it. Yeah, it's not just um not just about sex, it's uh the your drive, your want to live, your motivations for wanting, and then also to like to act, to move. You're literally moving from one place to another. Everybody likes a good finance thing, so hopefully, you know, you're you're uh don't want to say you're just motivated by finances, but that's a thing that you're considering as well. And you go in, have the motivation for finance, be in a better financial state. That's uh one of the things I'm talking about here, and uh that energy can also be creative. It's uh motivation, it's motivation for change, and it can also be creative in a way it can be considered art, so you don't have to just stick to the intellectual uh side of things, you can also go off into a different, totally different place and make art with your creative energy. Uh, it's just uh it's it's so good to have something like you know, a podcast or something, or even you know, the improv that I talk about. It's just having a motivation and obsession uh with something and having a passion. That's another way to get motivated as well, get that uh escape velocity going. Uh and uh you know, being self-aware is is good as well because a lot of people experience uh burnout trying to do a smooth transition to this. Uh, I know for me, I was always tired a lot over the decades, and I was asleep a lot. I know a lot of people like to take naps and everything like that. You know what I mean? Say what you will about naps, but naps happened good, bad, or indifferent, and I didn't realize I was getting burnt out. Uh, it really sucked because I was sleeping a lot and not getting a lot done, and then sometimes it dissociates, or just start watching something, whatever it is, and then hours would go by, days would go by. So, in my case, a couple decades went by. Not a whole lot got done. And I didn't realize a lot of that was due to burnout because feelings are a thing, and uh, if you don't get a control on those feelings, then you just kind of let them overwhelm you. Let them overwhelm you. They just I mean, yeah, that kind of yeah, you kind of let them overwhelm you, and it really sucks. So, stuff like that would happen, and uh yeah, didn't realize until more recently trying to do things, the way to get out of that, one way to get out of that, is to actually take a step forward and try stuff, and then eventually you go back to disassociating and you come back and you try another thing. Sometimes it takes a couple weeks to go in there. If y'all stuck around since the beginning, you know that uh have taken a couple breaks months in between and just get overstimulated and then realize that burnout happened again. So sometimes you take a step back, even though you uh want to take multiple steps forward, and that happens as well, and it's like oh, it's just a thing that happens, and uh I know for me meditation helps. I know people are like ooh, ooh, ooh, and it's like there's a bunch of different types of meditation out there, you gotta try them all. You all know here, campsters, that we are a fan of trial and error experimentation, that's how it is, and it's uh uh yeah, it kind of sucks sometimes when you go back, but you keep moving. Uh yeah, you get uh gotta keep trying. Oh, try not to ruminate right now. It sucks. It's part of the process, though. Just remember there are other people like you out there that get scared of change as well. That is something that happens, and we all have to go through it. Hopefully, if you're lucky, you'll have somebody in the back you up and will help you through. But if you're not, and you are somewhat like me and uh don't always have somebody in there to push you along. Hopefully, you have that internal motivation and take time for yourself. I'm a fan of metrics, so taking metrics, like and figuring out why this is like for me, I feel like there is a voice inside of me, and also one that just needs to be heard. And it's like, I hope you enjoy the opinions and expertial wisdom that I'm giving you, and you're using it for your benefit. It's just something that I hope is happening, and going out there and trying new things, and congratulations to the people that have. You have survived, even though it sucked. Rejection sucks, failing sucks, especially if you're an AP student like myself, not voluntarily, so it's not a brag. No about y'all, but we had placement tests in the schools I went to, and I tried that fail it, and they still put me in an advanced class. I purposely tried to give wrong answers, and they still put me in. What does that say? Uh okay, so desire, obsession, passion, all these different things give you a direction. And we need to develop discipline in order to motivate ourselves and keep going in the right direction. Uh, routine. Sticking to a routine is uh one of the ways I have discipline. I actually have to put out a schedule and try to stick to that schedule. Uh, I can say from my experience that it is really annoying at first to have to actually make the schedule in the first place, and then also have to stick to the schedule. It is trying. But I will say that eventually you keep doing it, and it becomes a routine, it becomes habit, and it becomes easier to do. So they were talking about I was talking about before this lock-in thing the kids are saying now, and it's like a thing that they're doing. It's like uh trying to put content out there, or and sometimes even specifically YouTube content, it's like you just have to do the videos, and also learn from your mistakes. So if you're doing 100 videos or whatever, also like take into account what is actually useful to you and helping you grow, and uh applying that for later so you make less mistakes and hopefully become more successful. And that comes from discipline andor routine. So let us try to find a schedule. That I would uh challenge you, camsters, that that's the first thing you gotta do, taking metrics and then making a schedule. So figure out uh what you want to do, how often you want to do it, and then planning that out and then sticking to that. It takes about 66 days to form a habit. Remember that. That's the average backed by science and studies, about 66 days. So as long as you're focusing on that, then you should be good. All right, so before we go, try to give you some uh other practical tools. Uh making notes is on here. Uh, let's see here. Don't censor the list, censorship is how you shrink your life, pick one desire. Yeah, staying focused on one different thing. I know for me, some of us are on the uh neuro spicy spectrum, and we like to do multiple things. I will say that the metaphor of as many spinning plates as possible without them falling is typical for my life, and it's really annoying as well because it's like, oh god, it's not even like a question or a want, it's just part of the nature of the whole entire thing. Oh, it's so annoying, but yeah, easily bored and uh trying to do as many things as possible without without failing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh something that happens and uh not not super into practice not practicing meditation, talking about meditation, trying to teach meditation, I will say. But uh take a moment to try and uh center yourself. Grounding practice is really good, not quite meditation, but getting onto the train of meditation, and then also remember gratitude, just be thankful for yourself for even listening to this or anything like this. Take that moment there. At least you are trying to be self-aware and put that stuff into practice, but also like you fucked up, but at least you're trying again. But you tried in the first place, that's also good, too. So just go out there, be kind to yourself, and realize that if you get rejected and you when you fuck up, you will survive. You will survive, you will survive, okay? All right, campsers. I hope I talked your ear enough. I know this is one of the topics I like to talk about a lot because I hope at least one person goes out and tries something different. Just go out and try it. Boy, man. At least if at least one person goes and tries something new, then please let me know. Come to the Instagrams or email me at the Yahoo's. Let me know. Julia's here for you. I like hearing those kind of things and talking about those kind of things. I will talk somebody's ear off about it. Also, I'll listen. We'll have a whole discussion about it for hours. I enjoy this kind of topic. This is why I'm here. This is why you're listening to me right now. And maybe even seeing me right now for the second time or third time or whatever it is now at this point. But that is all for now. This is Around the Kinky Campfire. I'm HH Julius, officially Julius Marquise, your entertainment creative, and I'll see you next time on a Thursday. Or well, actually, you'll see me on a Friday. Uh, you will listen to me on a Thursday. Okay? Hello. That's a wrap for this episode of the Around the Kinky Campfire podcast. We love having you by the fire, and we'd love to hear from you. Got a kinky question, a TV story, or a topic you want us to cover? Slide into our DMs and send us a message at Around the Kinky Campfire, Campfire with a K at yahoo.com. Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review wherever you're listening. Your support helps keep the flames burning and the conversations flowing. Follow us on Twitter, Kinky Campfire, Campfire with a K, YouTube, Around the Kinky Campfire, Campfire with a K. Or Instagram, Campfire Kingsters, Campfire with a K. To stay in the loop, join the community and keep the kick alive between episodes on Thursdays. Until next time, stay safe, stay sexy, and keep that fire burning.