Around the Kinky Kampfire Podcast

Primal Play isn't just what I do—it's who I am | S4 EP94

• Julius • Season 4 • Episode 3

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Julius Marques dives into the wild world of Primal Play - the raw, instinctual expression of dominance and submission through animalistic behaviors. He shares his personal experiences and insights on this lesser-understood aspect of kink that revolves around instinct over structure.

• Primal Play involves raw, instinctual expressions different from structured BDSM scenes
• Distinguished from Pet Play - not focused on specific animals but on unleashing your inner beast
• Typically involves Hunter and Prey dynamics with wrestling, biting, scratching, and mounting
• Energy exchange is central - skin-to-skin contact creates powerful connections
• Trusting your gut instinct is essential and must be practiced
• Society often teaches us to ignore our instincts, but in Primal Play they're celebrated
• Requires thorough negotiation and consent despite its spontaneous nature
• Julius will be teaching workshops on Primal Play and Relationship Anarchy

Join us on Thursdays on your favorite podcast platform as we share experiences, dive into deep discussions, and maybe even spark a little fire of your own. No shame, no judgment, just real talk around the Kinky Kampfire.


Come let us know what you think on IG - https://www.instagram.com/kampfirekinksters/

Speaker 1:

Welcome to Around the Kinky Campfire. Grab a seat, pour a drink and let's turn up the heat. This is the podcast where we explore the wild, wonderful and sometimes wicked world of kink, bdsm and alternative lifestyles. Whether you're a seasoned player, a curious newbie or just here for the stories, we've got something for you. Join us on Thursdays on your favorite podcast platform as we share experiences, dive into deep discussions and maybe even spark a little fire of your own. No shame, no judgment, just real talk around the Kiki Campfire. Let's get lit. Let's get lit On the Kinky Campfire.

Speaker 1:

This is your host, julius, here. Officially Julius Marquis and officially officially HH, julius Marquis. If you want to do anything super, duper, fancy, that's how you say the name, right there we are getting super official because, folks, campsters, we are about to teach some classes. I'm going to put up some video at some point, and probably not very specific where I'm going to be teaching at just yet, but I'll make more of an announcement as we get closer to the time. As you know, at that time of year where I go to a very nice convention where I like to volunteer my time. Well, we're getting a little bit more involved this year. I'm not being Mr Volunteer or Mrs Security. I'm doing Mr Class Teacher Workshop slash thing, all the above. That's there, but we'll get into that a little bit later.

Speaker 1:

For right now we have the ASMR five seconds, not really, I don't even know, it's like two seconds. Now I have something very tasty it's orange cream Coke Zero in a to-go bottle, also not sponsored, but it is my nightly drink. It's technically a school night at the time of this recording, so I've decided to just take it easy. I have one more of the beer I was drinking last time this recording, so I've decided to just take it easy. I have one more of the beer I was drinking last time the sour but I, you know, wanted to play. Cool as it's the beginning of the work week is tomorrow, best day ever. Oh, that great old Monday. Everybody knows that Mondays suck, but Monday sucks. But we are going to go into it with a good head on our shoulders as we are doing recordings and getting ahead of things. Okay, so enough with the chit-chat around the Kinky Campfire.

Speaker 1:

Julius, new episodes on Thursdays around noon Eastern time. And this is the podcast where I talk about my opinions. I don't care if I'm wrong or right. I don't care if you really agree with me or not, but you'll get my opinions based on my experiences, and I'll tell you some stories along the way and give you some education. They are facts, once again. You can agree or disagree with them all you want, but they are facts that I've gotten from smart people along the way, and I'll tell you stories of how I've been using those different elements in my life. Last episode we were talking about relationship anarchy and today we're talking about primal play as we get into the new season here. I had the season number wrong. I thought it was three or four, now Goodness. So, as y'all see, you change the name.

Speaker 1:

Most of these episodes are going to be by myself. I have a guest every now and then, but now going into more by myself as I get out there and do more official things and teaching the people in real life IRL, not just sitting here talking to a little dot in front of me. Thank you for all that are listening and downloading the episodes. I appreciate it. We're averaging more than 100 a month, 30 days, which is very nice, and I appreciate you guys sticking around after the break and still downloading episodes more.

Speaker 1:

Okay, enough fluffing around, enough farting around. We're going to get into it. Official, official Julius, not Horty Tarty Julius. We got a little official Irish bloke here. We're going to talk a little official Irish bloke here.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to talk a little bit about your Primal Play. Primal Play revolves around raw, instinctual and often animistic expressions of dominance and submission. Oh, such good, good. Okay. So start off right off the bat. I got some facts there that I just told you a definition of what Primal Play is. For me it's a Primal lifestyle. I live it, all the parts of the Primal Play I enjoy so much. And even if I'm not with an official-like kink partner, somebody that's new to kink, there's still going to be some Primal Play elements involved. And I tell them that and I get the negotiation going and the consensual stuff going. It's like I'm going to bite your tushy. Y'all have heard it before I'm going to bite a tushy. I wanted to talk about this once again Primal play, primal lifestyle stuff because this is another one of the classes I'm planning on teaching. The other class, relationship Anarchy, is the one I'm actually going to be teaching. So just so y'all know that's the class I'm going to be Primal Play. Now I just need to do the notes and make it all official and everything like that.

Speaker 1:

But Primal Play Two definitely things that are out there, if anybody's done any research on there. People have written papers and blogs and stuff about it, but there's no official classes or information on there. So there are kind of theories. Relationship Anarchy is a theory. Primal Play is a theory. It's just hard to explain a primal force that's just in you Like me. I just need to bite and scratch someone that I like Partners. They're going to have bruises on them because that's what I like to do. It's so enjoyable to me to just grab it and scratch it, just treat it like a chew toy. I'm getting lost in thought now. I can't even keep my examples straight. Oh man, just thinking back to the times, I just got a juicy tush in there and they tried to run and I grabbed them and then I held them down and I mounted them. It was so good. Okay, primal Play. We're going to keep it on track here, folks, I'm not going to go off into another la-la land. Okay, primal Play and BDSM Go back to official.

Speaker 1:

As I get out of my experiences it's intense, it's distinction-driven. They focus on raw emotions, physicality and a lack of formal structure. So what's so nice about Primal BDSM is you can feel it. It lets your creative juices get out there in an animalistic way. You just go on pure emotion at that point and you get in there and you start playing with your partner and hopefully they respond to it. So you don't really need words. It's more growls and and uh, gurs and all those different kind of things and guttural noises that come from the body. Apparently I growl when I do stuff. I don't really make moaning noises or anything like that, but I definitely growl. So it's a good way to be uninhibited with your desires and just feel your animalistic, feral energy, which is so great, especially if you're.

Speaker 1:

It doesn't have to be sexual. Okay, so it's great with sex, but it doesn't have to be sexual. You can definitely just do a kink scene with Primal Usually has to, or usually has to Usually ends up being in the form of wrestling and takedown and that kind of thing rough play. But you can do lighter versions. Some pet play people they do the Primal Wrestling as well Just want to make that distinction. I'll probably do that a couple times that Primal Play is not the same as Pet Play.

Speaker 1:

Two different things. Primal Play more of an animalistic type style where it's not really set to one specific animal, whereas Pet Play you usually take on the characteristics of a specific animal. Of course there's a spectrum and you can be all in the middle if you want to. However, you decide to use it because Julius loves some aliquart. Take what you want out of it and do what you will out of it. So say the Julius, I'll hear till kingdom come till death. Do us part, will it, or will it not? Will he keep speaking in the Irish tone? Do a little Irish jig, a little Irish dance, irish drinking song. Kind of stereotypical, but you know that's what they say. I don't see anybody denying it and I won't be doing it either. Okay, so that bloke Julius. Yeah, we got fancy Julius, the fancy voice, and then we got the bloke Julius down here in the Irish way of doing things. Okay so, key elements with Primal, we're going to stay on track. We're going to stay on track. See, my body can't even take the accents Coughing. Okay, instinct over structure, so we're going.

Speaker 1:

Instinctual gut feelings A lot of people, in my opinion, do not trust their gut. Trusting your gut is a practice that you need to do Something that needs to be practiced. A lot of people don't trust their gut because they're like, oh, I'm a higher level of thinking individual but I can look at somebody and be like, oh, hopefully they will change to how they have never met me before. They will change because now they're with me. Ha ha ha. No, that's not how that works, but that's fine. People will change whatever motivation they have. Maybe you, maybe it's not you, you can't really control that. But people should trust their gut more. Gut is the thing that you have to practice. It's the subconscious trying to speak out to you out there, all these conscious thoughts that you have and nuances and stuff like that. It's like maybe your gut and your subconscious is trying to tell you something. And that's so good about primals Just you feeling it through your body, get rid of all the rules and limitations, just feel it instinctually. Oh, so good.

Speaker 1:

Roles in Primal Play Usually I don't want to say Primal Predator anymore, don't want to use that. One Kind of has a weird connotation with it. So we'll do Primal Hunter and a Primal Prey Usually the main types of roles in Primal. I went through a different episode. You guys can go back and do the other Primal episode where we got super heady and I talked about all the different parts of it in there In the class notes that I have. There's going to be more notes.

Speaker 1:

I just wanted to keep this very experiential. I got country Julius now Experiential, experiential, okay. Experiential, experiential, okay. From my experiences out to y'all's ears that, yeah, there's the two types I go in between, but mostly hunter role for me. I like to grab the prey. Go out there, run away from me, that's totally fine. I will consensually pursue you, take you down and capture you and bring you back to my hole and may have my way with you. Oh, so good. So, yeah, the roles, animalistic behavior and energy exchange oh, my gosh, that is a very important part with the whole primal lifestyle is the energy exchange. If I'm biting you, okay, I'm giving you my energy, all right, and I'm sucking a little bit out of your butt cheek, that's just how it is, just sucking it out and giving it in when I mount you or hold you down or stand over you.

Speaker 1:

Any King Charles references there? Anybody, anybody know what I'm talking about? King Charles, okay, look it up on TikTok and YouTube shorts. King Charles, very non-aggressively for the most part, just standing there above. Okay, that's what we want to see in the primal play. I ain't got to do anything. I just stand over you and, yeah, you do what you will. You can try to get up off your backside, but I'm going to put you back down. Put that one paw on you and make you sit. Oh, such a good meme. Put that one paw on you and make you sit oh, such a good meme. I don't even know what it's called right now Viral videos of King Charles. If you don't know King Charles, he's so cute too. But yeah, just calm, calmness, stillness. You don't have to be rambunctious.

Speaker 1:

Energy I know you get very into the wrestling of Primal Play and the Rough Play, but you don't need to do all of that. It can be very low energy and still have a very good energy exchange. For me, I especially like skin-to-skin contact, so as much surface area touching partner's surface area as possible, love it. But yeah, even with the growling, biting and scratching, you can still do the hair pulling and rough handling. Kneading is another thing. If you know anything about cats and making biscuits biscuit making you can do that with your partner as well. Kneading is a thing that's so good. And if you really want to be mean, you can roll the skin too. This is just horrendous terrible. Oh, eye contact, yeah, all that stuff, yeah, I'm starting to get distracted again. Touchinging of the skin so good, just skin-to-skin contact. Get that energy exchange going, oh, so good.

Speaker 1:

And then we get into the psychology Not really going to touch so much on today, not a certified professional here, I just give my opinion on my experiences Not certified as of yet, not yet. I am officially your relationship spotter and your entertainment creative, hh Julius Marquis. I'll be out there teaching and stuff like that, but I'll be spotting people. I don't want to do any coaching. I'm not an officially certified individual Not as of yet but you can once again let go of inhibitions and work on the instinctual and you're experiencing a deeper connection and feeling powerful. Oh, yes, the instinctual feralness of it all Once you quote, unquote conquer your partner and you've taken them so good. And then also, yes, always be safe. Safe is sexy.

Speaker 1:

Be consensual, have the negotiation, let each other know what your boundaries are and your hard limits and soft limits and everything like that. Be consensual with it. But it's just so good when you can have that trust with somebody and engage in primal play. Uh, creme de la creme. We adding french in here as well. I don't have a good french accent, I'll get out there eventually, okay, uh, so just the technical notes of primal play and, um, how you do that there. Uh, you can get into more stuff when you actually get into the scene, which I won't get into the technical, uh side of it. I, I just love prim Play. It's just been so good for me.

Speaker 1:

It's something that I knew was there but I didn't know have the name for it and it was just something that I was like, oh, I just do this, but there's a name for it. Oh boy, if you don't know the theme around a Kinky Campfire as Julie is finding out that, all the stuff that makes someone me specifically awkward, there's a name for all of it Demisexual, polyamory and now primal lifestyle, oh my gosh, yeah, okay, there's a name for this thing. That's kind of interesting. But here I am and I'm talking to you about it and we'll be teaching about it. It's just something I do so hard to put into words and it's just a feeling and guttural, instinctual thing that you just like to do. I must ingest my partner in all the different ways and even when, just like cuddling and stuff like that, it's like I just want to envelop myself on you. Let's just absorb each other so good and, I think, society in general. So here's my opinion on the experiences. Once again, they tell you to numb your gut instinct and try to trust people and it's like huh, I'm on the fence.

Speaker 1:

As far as the red flags are good or bad, when you first start talking to somebody, I think people have red flags is fine. Your definition of red flags is all over the place. For me, it's like stuff that you might not like, but it's like that person doesn't know that you don't like it. So if you let them know, you know what your boundary is, and if they decide not to like adhere to your boundaries or respect your boundaries and they just kind of wash over them or whatever, it's like okay, maybe that person isn't for me, but it's like they started out having red flags. It depends on how bad it is.

Speaker 1:

Don't be rude to the waiter. That's like number one. Just don't be rude to the waitstaff. I don't know how you come back from that. That's definitely a big red flag in my book and a lot of people have it. But it's like if you tell somebody something, it's like, okay, just don't, you know, I don't like that. And then you can choose together where you want to still be together or not. But if they like, oh okay, I didn't know that, and they, you know, make the choice to change. That's a little bit different, so that kind of thing.

Speaker 1:

And for me it's like primal play. There is a, there is a reason why I brought this up. Primal play is something that not everybody enjoys. I mean, in general, there's going to be some bruises. You know, keep, in general there's going to be some bruises. You know, keep them to the areas that are safe. But some people just don't like bruises. That's fine too.

Speaker 1:

And it's like, maybe you know that's not for you, that's not. You know, that's not a red flag, but it's something that is a boundary with some people and may not be for you. So have that conversation. And for me it's like society makes it so you should conform. But it's like respect your boundaries and know what your needs and wants are in a relationship and your quote-unquote red flags and hopefully, when you practice that, that will help you figure out what your gut is trying to tell you there are over a million nonverbal indicators out there. There's only like 150 that you actually subconsciously recognize. Most of the other, all the other ones, are subconscious. So you're not going to understand what that are, what those are, and to me that's your gut instinct. Trying to speak to you, if you feel a certain way about somebody, usually there's a reason. Maybe you should take a step back and do some more analysis before you jump into something. And yeah, for me it's like I mean you got to trust your gut and society's morals are not going to be your own necessarily.

Speaker 1:

As y'all know, we are a taboo community most of the time the kink and the polyamory and just non-monogamy in general. A lot of people don't know what's going on. I am here as your educator, your relationship exporter. I'll be here to try to educate the people, the masses, as much as I can. Can't get to everybody, that's not my goal. I just like talking about this stuff. And then it's like you know what, let me go ahead and talk to people that want to learn about this stuff. So thank you, camsters. You are here downloading this episode because you enjoy what I've been saying and hopefully enjoy me myself and how I present the information. So hopefully that was as convoluted as possible. Really hard to talk about the upbringing of it all, because for me, once again, it's like I just was this way.

Speaker 1:

I never understood that people don't like biting tushies. It's like, do you have this juicy tush and you're not biting it, like even when you're watching porn. I don't see a lot of biting in porn, but like people will be up in there even like licking an asshole and like you ain't biting the inside of the thigh or the cheeks, but you're gonna lick the asshole, go straight to licking the asshole and it's like what? There's so much juicy, tender skin there. I don't understand this. If I'm gonna do you the favor no, if I'm gonna do both of us the favor of licking your assholes, like I'm gonna there's gonna be a cost there I'm gonna bite some juicy tush. That yeah, yeah, good stuff.

Speaker 1:

And then, as we wrap up this episode, I will be teaching this at some point along with Relationship Anarchy. It will be a workshop, it will be hands-on, it will be interactive, all those kind of things. There will probably be a mat out there. I'll need some kind of chew toy as a demo person to be there for me. So hopefully that will come in nicely.

Speaker 1:

I'm excited to teach this because to me, teaching stuff that comes instinctually to me is very easy to do because it's well no, it's like half and half it's easy to talk about. Maybe not be able to understand people that don't understand it Very heady people that you know. You got to practice those instincts in that gut thing because you got to feel it. It's mostly a feeling type deal when you're uh talking about primal stuff. So hopefully people understand and it's not just about the uh outwardly showing, showing showiness of it all can't have a big ego when you're talking about this kind of stuff. It's like you do it for yourself. You don't need to put on a show for other people, in my opinion.

Speaker 1:

Okay, all right, quick overview touching on a subject that I like to talk about often, but this is HH Julius Marquis, your relationship spotter, your entertainment creative. Oh, getting more fancy here. Now we're back into the bloke. The bloke, julius, signing off today on Around the Kinky Camp I've lost the accent now I don't remember where it is, but short little episode talking about that kind of thing. Please check us out on all the major podcasting platforms the iTunes, the Spotify and the Googles I believe the Amazons as well every Thursday around noon Eastern time. Uh, this is Julius signing out.

Speaker 1:

Hello, that's a wrap for this episode of the around the kinky campfire podcast. We love having you by the fire and we'd love to hear from you. Got a kinky question, a steamy story or a topic you want us to cover, slide into our DMs and send us a message at aroundthekinkycampfire campfire with a K at yahoocom. Don't forget to subscribe, rate and review wherever you're listening. Your support helps keep the flames burning and the conversations flowing. Follow us on Twitter kinkycampfire campfire with a K, youtube Around the Kinky Campfire Campfire with a K, or Instagram Campfire Kingsters Campfire with a K To stay in the loop. Join the community and keep the kink alive between episodes on Thursdays. Until next time, stay safe, stay sexy and keep that fire burning.