Around the Kinky Kampfire Podcast

The Return (Again) of the Kinky Kampfire!! | Season 4 EP 92

• Julius • Season 4 • Episode 1

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Julius Marques returns to the podcast after a hiatus, introducing his new vision as a "relationship spotter" rather than a coach or therapist. He shares his journey through imposter syndrome and his plans to teach relationship anarchy with unconventional techniques.

• Taking time away from podcasting after questioning qualifications despite being invited as a guest on another show
• Developing educational content on relationship anarchy for in-person workshops
• Introducing the concept of being a "relationship spotter" to help during difficult relationship transitions
• Advocating for personalized "a la carte" approach to relationships rather than rigid structures
• Embracing failure as necessary for growth in relationships and personal development 
• Sharing ongoing queer journey and the freedom to evolve identities over time
• Focusing more on solo episodes while still occasionally featuring guests
• Planning to be more active on social media with educational content

If you have questions about non-monogamy, BDSM, or alternative relationships, reach out on Instagram or email us at aroundthekinkykampfire@yahoo.com. Subscribe, rate, and review to help keep the conversations flowing.


Come let us know what you think on IG - https://www.instagram.com/kampfirekinksters/

Speaker 1:

Welcome to Around the Kinky Campfire. Grab a seat, pour a drink and let's turn up the heat. This is the podcast where we explore the wild, wonderful and sometimes wicked world of kink, bdsm and alternative lifestyles. Whether you're a seasoned player, a curious newbie or just here for the stories, we've got something for you. For the stories, we've got something for you. Join us on Thursdays on your favorite podcast platform as we share experiences, dive into deep discussions and maybe even spark a little fire of your own. No shame, no judgment, just real talk around the Kinky Campfire, let's get lit. Welcome back, everybody. It's been a while. This is your host, hh Julius, here today. Ain't got no crazy names to spout out about, we just jumping right into it. Okay, that's how it is. This is the redo of the Pillowfort Sessions, season 3. This is the redo of the Pillowfort Sessions, season 3.

Speaker 1:

We are here today to talk about the Kiki, polly, bdsm, queer, well, non-monogamous things that we talk about. I'm just going to get right into it. I've been gone for a while. I will say that right away. I'm going to tell you that I had to take a step back for a little bit, a little bit of a transition period. Took some time off to think about things. What really happened is I am part of Reddit Y'all know this from before and I am part of Relationship Anarchy Reddit because I am a practitioner of Relationship Anarchy. I'm actually going to be teaching a class with it, mixing a little unconventional techniques in there as well, and I'll be teaching that soon, hopefully at an education space or even a convention sometime in the near future, and I submitted for education spots and also on Relationship Anarchy Reddit.

Speaker 1:

There was a submission for a podcast that is very much non-monogamous in nature and I actually got invited to be a guest on the show because of my responses and my experiences with Relationship Anarchy and I kind of freaked out a little bit with relationship anarchy and I kind of freaked out a little bit. I was like huh, do I do the thing that I do or is it just like imposter syndrome or imposter, imposter, just full-on imposter? So I was like you know what? I need to go ahead and actually start teaching this stuff for people or putting stuff information out there and, if you so choose, to accept it, that is on you and I yeah, I didn't even I didn't respond to that email saying that I got picked to be a guest on the show because I I felt, uh, that I was not quite qualified to do it, even though I've been talking about it in this podcast for many years now.

Speaker 1:

I feel like I should definitely be in person teaching. I don't know how I feel about zoom or like discord or something like that. That's okay as far as I'm concerned, but I prefer the in-person plus. The unconventional techniques that I plan on using are better for in person, and I wanted to get that going. So I actually have notes in the slide show pretty much put together, and I'm not just talking about it on the internets, even though people are listening. I appreciate it, all the people that do. Even though I've been taking the break, there are still people downloading and listening to this podcast that I've been doing yes, I do have a drink, not doing the ASMR five seconds.

Speaker 1:

I feel like there's more something I can do when I have a guest on sporadically and, on that note, I would like to say that I have notes on how I would like to conduct the podcast going forward. Let me finish up this what's been going on and fill you all in with that. I'm going to be teaching. I want to go around teaching. With that I'm going to be teaching. I want to go around teaching. The goal is to get invited to people's things, events and shows and stuff like that and talk about the good word of non-monogamy, with the BDSM and the queer influences on there. I feel like there's not a lot of respon-, respon-, respon-, respon-tation, respon-tation as far as I'm concerned, for people with my background, and I think I should talk about that kind of stuff and get those assumptions out of there, cause y'all know I hate me some assumptions.

Speaker 1:

So going into this new season I will probably be more focusing on solo episodes. Just, you're going to hear me more ranting and still give me my opinion. I'm not going to be super focused on guests as much, but there will be guests. So pretty much is going to be like 90% pillow for session and if I get a guest that wants to talk about it I'll bring them on. But hopefully you'll see me guesting more on different things. I will respond to that email at some point in the near future and hopefully have a lot less hilarious that I say that a lot less imposter syndrome, because I will have taught a class class sometime soon and you guys will hear about it, cause I will put it on the socials. Uh, we'll try to get better at that as well.

Speaker 1:

Was doing well when episodes come out, but I feel like you guys should get some more tidbits in along the way. So I'm I'm getting a little help with creating shorts and putting those out there now. To finish up what is happening going forward, I kind of just went right into that. Uh, to finish up what is happening going forward, I kind of just went right into that. Hopefully, more live action, in-person learning sessions.

Speaker 1:

But I would really like to end up being a not just a relationship coach, but a relationship spotter. I will want to be there when you are having difficulties in your relationship and not just coaching you with it, but a spotter If nobody knows what a spotter is in uh, lifting heavy weights, lifting heavy things and putting them up and then putting them back down. Uh, I, there is a spotter when you were trying to get your personal best or highest weight. Keep it very simple when you're trying to get your highest weight, you might end up dropping those weights. That is a thing that is very common. There are weights specifically meant to be dropped when you're lifting heavy out there at gyms and you usually have a spotter, so somebody watching you makes sure you don't hurt yourself. You can drop those weights safely without hurting other people or damaging the equipment because some of that equipment is very expensive for those gyms but mainly not to hurt yourself.

Speaker 1:

So I want to be a relationship spotter. I will there, there when you're trying to do the most uncomfortable assist of things and you are trying to push past your comfortability zone, your limits, and getting out there and trying the relationship anarchy, the non-monogamy, however you want to be, you just want to include the kink in your life. Every other weekend or whatever, I want to be your spotter there. You come to me with difficult questions and I give you practices for you to use and call you out when you're slipping that kind of thing, because I am not a caregiver, I am not a hand holder, so I can't be a therapist. I don't. I couldn't be a therapist or really even a coach. Maybe we'll see. Let's take a big old, definite maybe on the coaching thing, but I definitely want to be there as a spotter.

Speaker 1:

And a lot of questions that I see on the Reddits and random let's say, non-traditional relationship websites is how do I talk to my partner about this and this. I've been with them for decades and millennia and I don't know how to bring up this conversation because it's difficult. It's like have the conversation, that's all you can do. You're not a practiced person in these conversations, especially if you're introducing it to your already established relationship, so you're going to fuck up. That's where I step in. It's like you fucked up. How about try it this way? You fucked up. How about try it this way? You fucked up Again. How about you try it this way? One part 132. There are multiple ways to go about introducing different aspects into your relationship. As there are different aspects to introduce into your relationship and hopefully y'all were paying attention, but Julius loves an a la carte menu I will take what I want of certain things and apply it to my relationship as I see fit, and I believe everybody has that right to do, and you have the right to experiment with different things.

Speaker 1:

I myself have been on a queer genie. Queer genie rubbed the lamp and I got three wishes and came out that I am queer. Ah, I found out what I actually am. No, I haven't. I have been experimenting, folks, with my queer representation. I can speak still? That's how rusty I am. I haven't. I have been experimenting folks with my queer representation. I can speak still, that's how rusty I am. I can't even speak. I am on my queer journey for a long time and I get to choose what I represent as and how I represent. So you as a person, hopefully of sound mind I don't know, I'm not a therapist, but hopefully you are of sound mind you know how to look up information and see if it fits for yourself.

Speaker 1:

I really do strongly dislike it when people think they have to present one certain way and then everybody else is like oh, you're that now and it's like no, I'm that today, I might be something else tomorrow, barring any new information. So I would just like to say that that you are an able-bodied person and you can do that yourself. And of course, I have to stick in general on there, because everybody has the whole thing. What about this person? Like? I'm talking to the generalizations, because I can't account for everybody. I'm a person. I can't account for everybody. I'm not only a person, I can't think of every single situation and every single person. It's not possible. I'm talking about generalities. Okay, so, going on the generalization that everybody's of sound mind. You can try the different things yourself and see if it fits for you, and I am a fan of that. Let's all fuck up together, because you cannot grow without failure. You have to fail multiple times and then keep trying it.

Speaker 1:

I say this to y'all like I'm a big old know-it-all, but I am still doing that myself, especially with the social situation, because I'm 100% socially awkward. I'm a socially awkward individual. I will continue to be a socially awkward individual and I'm going to fuck up more times than not. Even if it's something that I represent as and I know primal lifestyle being one of them, I still fuck up with that. I have trouble explaining it to people and it's like I live the lifestyle and I talk on the internet and I'm planning on being an educator. But guess what? I'm going to fuck up and I'll keep going because I will learn from my mistakes, if nothing else. I know that for a fact. I say correct, like it's going to be good the next time around, but it's probably going to take me like 100 times, and guess what. I'm totally fine with that Because you know what. I'm doing this mainly for fun and I'm doing it because this is something I'm passionate about and I do it with intentionalities. So, even if I do fuck up, I know I'm going to be on this path for the rest of my life and I'm totally fine with that, 100%. I found a passion for something and I'm going to stick with it. Thank you Now, you people that are with me, my campsters I appreciate you sticking around, especially those people, once again, that downloaded even though I wasn't putting new episodes out. Thank you, and I hope you guys stick around.

Speaker 1:

Right now I'm on the path of, hopefully, consistent episodes. I'm not going to say how many I plan on actually doing, cause we'll see. We'll do a one week at a time. Uh, but uh, I was going to go into my first topic, but I feel like I'll just go ahead and keep talking about this for another few minutes here, cause I'm like halfway through my episode. I'm not going to keep them super long, especially when I'm talking by myself. I feel like consistent uploading is better than boring you guys with extra filler just to get to a certain amount of time. So that's totally cool as well. Yeah, I'm saying a lot of um now I'm running out of things to say. I was going to do something different with this episode, but I've decided to do this differently than I planned on doing it as well.

Speaker 1:

Once again, if you are interested in the extra information and want your questions answered, I still haven't gotten a whole lot of hits on the emails or the social medias, but feel free to message me on Instagram and I'm still going to have the intro. So you had you guys heard how to get a hold of me and the emails and stuff like that. Let me know what you're thinking. Otherwise, I will gladly just start answering questions off Reddit. I have no problem with that. There's some good questions there and some good really really, really good comments. If you don't know anything about Reddit or you're like, oh, I heard about Reddit and this, this, no, but yes, but no, but yes, it is all about the comments, read those comments.

Speaker 1:

Don't just look at the questions, because a lot of those are just dumb and repeats Like people don't know. There's a search button on Reddit. I need to do an episode on how to read it, because it's amazing to me how many repeat questions that are put in there and then actually people in the comments will go ahead and link that particular Reddit previous Reddit into that person's comment section of the question they repeatedly asked again and it's like why are we doing this? Just go ahead and hit that search button and go ahead and read what people have said before. Plenty of answers and plenty of questions of how do I get my partner to understand that I'm non-monogamous. It's like search from before People have asked this question. Okay, so I'll do that. Go ahead and hit me up and let me know what your questions are.

Speaker 1:

Your relationship spotter, hh Julius, is here and I've officially extended my name. My official name now is Julius Marquise. So if you see that anywhere, that is me. That is I, who I'm on the Around the Kinky Campfire podcast, the Pillowfort Sessions, didn't even say that at the beginning, I don't think, but that's fine because I said it now. Okay, so as I wrap up here, please look forward to me reiterating the main points that I'd subscribe to live the lifestyle of, because I appreciate y'all downloading and listening and also I'm practicing for the classes I plan on teaching. I will post those in the social as well, so you can see videos of that. Hopefully. At some point you saw some pictures of me in there and then hopefully you'll see some videos of me going forward.

Speaker 1:

Thank you for listening once again to the beginning episode of season three of Around the Kinky Campfire, the Pillow Fort Sessions. I should just be Around the Kinky Campfire. At this point there's not even Pillow Fort S sessions, so I'm not even going to put that in there anymore. Probably I'll just be around the Kinky Campfire and if I have a guest I will make it known who the guest is. I'll probably put their name first. That would make more sense. So you guys know whether it's just me talking at y'all or me just talking to myself and you guys listening, and you eavesdroppers, you little pervs, my campsters. Thank you so much. We'll see how this next season turns out, how long it goes, but that is all for now. Hh, julius Marquise, your entertainment creative, your relationship spotter, is out for now.

Speaker 1:

Hello, that's a wrap for this episode of the Around the Kinky Campfire podcast. We love having you by the fire and we'd love to hear from you. Got a kinky question, a steamy story or a topic you want us to cover? Slide into our DMs and send us a message at aroundthekinkycampfire campfire with a K at yahoocom. Don't forget to subscribe, rate and review wherever you're listening. Your support helps keep the flames burning and the conversations flowing. Follow us on Twitter Kinky Campfire Campfire with a K. Youtube Around the Kinky Campfire Campfire with a K. Or Instagram Campfire Kingsters Campfire with a K To stay in the loop. Join the community and keep the kink alive. Between episodes on Thursdays Until next time, stay safe, stay sexy and keep that fire burning.